Listen to the lyrics

Everything I ever needed to know about love and life I learned by listening to the lyrics.  It started when I was very young, maybe four or so.  I can clearly remember my mother ironing and I would help by buttoning every single button on my father's dress shirts.  Little did I know that this "helpful" act would cause my father much annoyance when his hand would get stuck in his sleeve.  What music we were listening too? Neil Diamond.

I knew the words off by heart.."Shilo when I was young, I used to call your name"..."You don't bring me flowers anymore" and of course "Love on the rocks, ain't no big surprise" Looking back even though I had no idea what he was talking about, I felt like I understood him...he sounded like he knew all about love. And he did...the flowers do stop, the love songs don't get sung to you forever..and before you know it, you just turn off the light. Sad but true.

A little more forward in my life and I can clearly remember road trips with my parents and my sister, listening to Dylan and Baez.

"Yes, to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free

  Silhouetted by the sea, circled by the circus sands             

  With all memory and fate driven deep beneath the waves 

  Let me forget about today until tomorrow"

Those words only grew to resonant deeper with me as time passed.  And of course singing along with my mom to Buffy St. Marie and Barry Manilow..I learned to be angry at the injustice of a nation and at the same time to know a showgirl named Lola.

My baby sister Kate fit into the clan right away and proved to be a great source of meaningful music. One of my most treasured gifts is a CD she made me with an accompanying book explaining what each song means to her in regards to me.  Every time I listen to it, it's like she is talking to me.

Recently I made the shocking discovery that my husband, the love of my life, the man I married after an amazing whirlwind romance......wait for it...doesn't know the lyrics to anything.

"I never listen to the words of songs" he blithely said to me.

WHAT??!!!

What have I done? How can that be? I could feel the 16-year-old within me cringe and shake her finger with an 'told-you-so' scowl on her face.  How could I?  What was I thinking?  I did mention it was a whirlwind right? Some how I missed the "don't you love the words of this song?" question. 

Needless to say, he wasn't pulling my chain,..... not by any means.  I recently played Diamonds and Rust to him in the car and he just couldn't get it.  He kept asking "what did she say?"

Oh God...

I shared Bono's insights into my soul with the song "Walk On" and my poor husband really tried to get it for my sake, but when you don't feel it you just don't. "What was that last line? I don't understand"

How could I love someone that doesn't take music as seriously as I do? And yet, I do.  Well, maybe I take it seriously enough for the both of us. And as my mother reminded me in an email, my husband hears in the music what I gather from the words. He is musical and I am lyrical.   How true she is.  Still, I speak lyric, for now anyway. The words are what stay with me, they are what I hear. 

"Speaking strictly for me, we both could have died then and there" are words that continue to haunt me.  Along with "I can't take my eyes off of you". Just typing the words give me chills even now, even years and thousands of miles away .  I remember the exact moment I first heard the words and who I heard them with and most importantly, what it all meant to me then.

For me, lyrics are the poetry that touches me on every level. Like the singer was there with me, knows just how I feel or felt.  I'm not ashamed of what happened because I know someone understands.  And I have hope that it will get better, I will heal, this is normal and so forth.

My whole family listens to the lyrics but it started for me with my mother.  She taught me.  Ironing to the Diamond.  My life changed then.  I don't iron but I'll always remember the words and I'll always listen to the lyrics.  Playing certain tunes brings me right back to good places, sad places, turning points and dead ends.  There are some songs I can't even listen to anymore, the memories are too difficult to navigate. 

My sister Jen is the magician in the family that always hears the lyrics correctly.  I make them up when I can't understand the artist or I just skip over but not Jen.  She ALWAYS knows.  We have fought many times. 


Its the old mistake of "You make me feel like a man should a woman" or is it  "You make me feel like a natural woman'" ????
 Yeah...Jen would always know, she's good at the correct lyrics part. And she gets it, we can talk through song lyrics.  It has become a language of sorts to us. 

With my Dad... I can't remember much about him showing me new lyrics but he always knows what Dylan is saying and no matter what I wanted him to hear, he would always patiently listen to me.  And he always showed the proper enthusiasm, which greatly encouraged me. What I loved, he would love and when I explained it, how I saw it, he always agreed with me. From Dave Matthews to Bono...my Dad would always stop to listen.

My close friends too, we always shared in discussing lyrics.  Certain songs will always belong in my mind to them, make me think of them whenever I hear those words.  


So, a successful whirlwind romance without sharing an obsession with song lyrics??? Yes it happened and I don't regret it. Good thing too, otherwise I'd just be "Stuck in a Moment" that I can't get out of. Thankfully instead I'm "Crazy in Love"