One whole year passed in the blink of an eye. I can't believe it even as I type it. Already a week has gone by since Dennis and I crossed the 365 day mark and the time is continuing to whirl past us.
We were able to spend a delicious night and day away in celebration down in Miami at the Ritz on Key Biscayne. It was romantic and lovely and far too short. We were treated like royalty and I grew accustomed to it all instantly. The chocolate strawberries, the bottles of champagne, the rose petals everywhere. From the moment we arrived to the moment we drove away with heavy hearts, every second was bliss. A perfect anniversary gift to each other. Just the two of us, drinking our frozen cocktails with sand between our toes.
And then our family and loved ones threw us a beach island dream anniversary party complete with shells and sand and a cake decorated in sea blue icing. It was an evening spent surrounded by those we love and those who love us. For me the bittersweetness of the evening increases because Dennis and I have only a few weeks left before we leave for France.
We decided, after much thought and sweat and doubt and pro & con lists, that a move to help his mother is what we need to do now. So as of July 11th or so, I will be leaving Florida behind and heading North to be with my family in RI and then off to France for three months. We hope to make it a permanent move to France, with the three months being the first leg. We need to discover if we can make money there, have a place to live and many other odd and end decisions before we can say that we are staying for sure. But our goal is to stay there for as long as Dennis' mum needs us.
It's an incredible idea, one I can't really absorb. Even as I write, I know that I am not fully expressing myself. My heart is at once afraid and thrilled, terrified and impatient to be gone. But one emotion I feel completely is that now my heart will be divided even a little more, because there are some beautiful people here that I will miss very much. People who have loved me even though I fought this place with every inch of my being. People who have forgiven me for being unreasonably homesick and sweaty for a non-stop year. I have come to love my Florida family of friends and now that I am facing more goodbyes, I am heartsick. It seems like for me, this whole year of marriage has been a road full of goodbyes. I want to say hello instead.
Soon I will be saying HELLO to France, my new home. I will carry RI in my blood and Florida in my heart. I hope I can fully express to my newest friends how much they mean to me and how much I am going to miss them. Their kindness and comfort, their patience with me. One way or another, we will return, if only to visit again in September. But I hope they all know that I am grateful for their friendships and sorry to have to leave them, no matter where I am headed. I refuse to grow used to saying goodbye.
